Number Six - Four More To Go!

Hey friends, I appreciate all the comments that I have received from you.  I am glad the last several blogs have helped, encouraged, or poked you enough to respond.  This blog is about Choosing Holiness Over Talent.  I constantly lived with this tension as a pastor - do you?

"Can we have a cup of coffee?"  Tom knew I had witnessed the temper tantrum earlier that morning while the worship team was practicing.  He reluctantly agreed.  He looked like he was going to get in big trouble from the boss.  I put my arm around him, and with grace, assured him I just wanted to find out what was going on in his life.  It was out of his nature to take himself so serious and snap at others.

Later that afternoon we met at Starbucks.  For a couple of hours he shared some of the stuff going on in his life.  He was living a different lifestyle than was being projected on a Sunday Morning.  What we saw on Sunday was an amazing leader, musician, sensitive guy.  On the other side of Sunday, his life was a mess with some bad stuff.

As he was talking about addictions and other issues, I was thinking to myself, what is going to happen to worship without Tom?  I am embarrassed to admit that, but it's true.  I got control of my selfishness and listened to Tom.  I hope I responded in a way that Jesus would have -- Tom was eventually restored and  it never became a talkative issue in the church - not even a prayer request.

That evening, I went back to my problem.  We were missing talent.  I remember thinking the tension in my thoughts: Talent vs. Holiness.  Obviously, I want both.  But I choose holiness.  It's more important to me that the person that is leading the congregation in worship or any volunteer role is not pretending.  You cannot lead someone where you can't go. 

How do you get this message out to volunteers and staff?  The first thing, get it out there before the issue happens. Don't wait to  develop a policy on this issue until you are sitting at Starbucks and someone is confessing an addiction to pornography to you.  Don't wait until a small group leader tells you he is having an affair.  Set the boundaries early. Set the boundaries that communicate love and restoration. I am shocked at some of the procedures outlined in policies and bylaws.  "If you do this... then you are kicked out!"  Really?  That's grace and reconciliation?  Come on!

The second thing I would say is live authentically.  Don't pretend you never struggle with missing the mark.  It was not uncommon for me to apologize to a staff member for something that I said or failed to do.  My daughers will tell you that I apologized to them all the time for messing up as a dad.  My wife, if she had a dollar for every time I had to own my junk in our relationship, she would be listed as one of the wealthiest women in Chicago... right up there with Oprah. I wanted my congregation to know I was real.  I was horrified by the thought that my daughters or my staff would ever listen to me preach or do anything upfront and think to themselves, "what a fake!"  There were tons of times they saw me and said, "he is frail, imperfect, messed up but he desires to be right with God and man."

The more one hides behind talent and slowly starts to replace holiness with sin and selfishness, is a very dangerous road.  So, create a safe place for people to be real.  I know there are many that will disagree strongly with me on this but I will say it here and maybe they won't see it - our holiness message often shuts people down from being real.  If the scripture says, confess your sins to one another so that you may be healed... and we refuse to admit sinful behavior then no wonder we seldom see emotional, spiritual and physical healing in the church.

Bottom line is this: It's always holiness over talent.  But holiness doesn't mean people won't struggle in life, confess sin,  or mess up.  Make sure your definition of holiness is all about Jesus and not your behavior or how perfect you are.

That is all. 

Number 4 & 5 Stupid Thing

The 4th stupid thing we to do to keep our churches from growing is to treat children's ministry like babysitting. The strongest healthiest churches today are investing in their children.  They are equipping and training the very brightest and best in the congregation.  They do not see technology, training events, or flat screen TV's as excessive spending for 'just the kids'.  These things among others are seen as investments into children finding Christ and being discipled.

Why should the sanctuary have thousands of dollars worth of sound and tech equipment and children have chalk boards and dirty toys?  Why do they even have toys?  Why are we putting thousands of dollars in parking lots, church vans, choir music, and sending newsletters in the mail when the carpet is dirty, the children's space smells, and teachers are not even preparing until Sunday Morning?  Yet, we all know Jesus prioritized children.

I am not against having sound systems, paved parking lots, and quality coffee but not at the expense of ignoring Student Ministry.

Invest in your student ministry - make it a priority to do more with less and make sure that children and teens, know they are valued and loved.  Remember a written value statement of children or family ministry is only worth something if you are investing in that something. I can say I value missions and reaching the lost but if I am not serving and winning lost people, it's only words.

New Covenant Church of God in Peoria hired a Children's Pastor when they couldnt' afford it, made their children's room tech savy, makes sure that every student that wants to attend youth convention or youth camps are provided a way by scholarship. They don't do it because they have lots of money, they do it because it is a value.

And Number 5
while we are on the subject...
Don't update, it's good enough.

This is a confession of mine.  Some of you know that while I was at Shorewood, we were constantly planning for relocation.  Over several years, we accumulated a significant nest egg for future plans.  However, when the economy turned and it was obvious we were not going to be building for a long time... we should have updated and remodeled the building.  The carpet needed replaced, the outside was looking old, the youth were meeting in a moldy basement. Sound equipment was outdated.  I could go on.

I often look back and think, had we reallocated resources, maybe we would have embraced our stated value of student ministry with more integrity. How can I say I value student ministry or excellence when stains in the carpet stared at every person as they walked in the door and our class rooms had VCR's and Cassette Players?  I cast no stone, except at me on this issue.  We were pleasantly full in two services.  We were talking about adding a third service.  All was well and people were coming to Christ regularly.

So you might ask, wasn't it the right decision?  Five years later, I am walking into buildings, including Shorewood that are being remodeled and updated.  No, it was not the right decision.  These creative leaders and pastors are making their buildings look awesome.  The children's ministry rooms are looking so cool, I want to work in children's ministry!  Flat screens have replaced bulletin boards and metal folding chairs are replacing comfortable seating that makes me want to stay and visit.

If you are in the Shorewood area - stop and see the stuff they are doing.
If you are in Decatur - stop and see what a remodeled sanctuary looks like.
If you are in Champaign - stop and see what fresh paint and cleaning out clutter can do.
If you are in Marion - stop and see a children's ministry cooler than a set on Nickleodean.
If you are in Herrin, stop and see a crazy cool lighting system.
If you are in Freeport, stop and see how chairs and carpet can change the way a building looks.
And Chicago... wait a few more months and see the new Vernon Park Church of God.

People who we are trying win to Christ, deserve better than, "it's good enough."
Children and Youth need a place to invite friends to a place they are not embarrassed about.
We need to be able to welcome guest into our places of worship and not apologize for paneling, bad lighting, shag carpet, or pictures that are 20 years old still hanging in the same place.

Do your best for a Father that has done His best!

How serious are we when we say, we are going to change the world but not the carpet?  I just think it communicates what we value.

3rd Stupid Thing - Second Rate Worship

Colossians 3:17

Whatever you do, in word or in deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, giving thanks to the Father because of Him.

This is the 3rd posting on stupid things churches do to keep from growing. This is the most difficult one to write yet,  because it sounds so judgmental and subjective. I hope to write about principles and not my personal ideas and preference about worship but not sure if it can be done.

Here's the problem I witness most often; Worship is not God centered. Songs are often weak in theology, talk about one attribute of God over and over or sounds like passionate lovemaking music to Jesus.  I am all for intimate worship that is God focused and I don't mind a little focus on 'me and God'. However, worship should leave me with an awe of the power and wonder of God. It should remind me that God can be trusted if I walk with him in obedience.  I sometimes am left with feeling after worship that no matter what, God will work it out for me because He is on my side. What happened to my responsibility of faithfulness to God.

When will someone quote Jeremiah 29:11 AND 12. If you turn back to me, them I will hear you.

Worship should be full of If...Then statements. If you love then they will know you are His disciples. If you are connected to the vine then you will bear fruit. If you seek first the kingdom of God then these things will be given to you.  What I am saying is that I leave many worship services feeling that I am strong enough to make it instead of God is strong enough to carry me through it.  Worship should connect me with God first and foremost.  He is the potter and I am the clay.

Secondly, an awful lot of time is wasted in worship.  Wasted in announcements, inside jokes, tons of music, long empty prayers, unprepared ushers, long sermons. I have been guilty of all these things and I know they happen but it should be rare.  It doesn't bother me if there is a tech problem, that happens. It bothers me if nobody planned prayer time. It is the same ole prayer said the same ole way every Sunday.  Come on, get creative and teach people to pray.

How much music is necessary? Think about it... It is not a concert and specials are not special most of the time.

I was at a church yesterday that called all teachers and school employees forward and the congregation came round them and laid hands on them.  So cool. There was a brief encouraging message given and then a wonderful prayer prayed over them. I was a guest and thought, "this church loves teachers and school systems!"

When planning worship, who do you have in mind? A skeptic, newcomer, old timer, teenagers? Who? I always tried to plan worship that a newcomer would feel comfortable being part of. I wanted to start with something that anyone could relate to: humor. I wanted to connect with even the skeptic within the first few minutes. I wanted the songs to make sense at the beginning. We are singing lots of weak songs with a great melody.  Sing songs that mean something. Shortly after that we would move into a more intimate time of worship. This time was often explained each Sunday in a way like this: "in the next few minutes, we are going to celebrate our commitment and love for Jesus Christ. We welcome you to sing with us or just read the words. This is a time for us to renew, reconnect and celebrate our relationship with Jesus."

Prayer time was focused and different each week. We would focus on things like community issues, government officials, healing, other churches, certain ministries, the lost, the vision of the church, staff and leaders, etc.... I wanted prayer to always be a surprise. Sometimes we would light a candle for a specific need and other times we would anoint with oil? I wanted people to know that we were a praying church and we believed in an awesome God.

The only announcements given were ones that affected the entire church body. Not meetings, not individuals small groups, not youth group stuff.

Birthdays and Anniversaries. Okay, I know this will make a few angry but maybe they don't read the blog anyway. Birthdays and Anniversary time during worship just doesn't fit. You may like it and they may like it but visitors could care less and actually it does nothing for our encounter with God.  It detracts and is a waste of time.

Last thought, video your worship service and with your worship leader, pastor and entire team, watch the service and start with a few changes.    Wait  a few weeks and do it again. Make a few more changes. Work at making worship the absolute best that it can be.

Number 2 - The Role of the Pastor

What are the main disciplines of a pastor?  What should the disciplines be?  I have been writing about stupid things churches do to keep from growing.  I submit these thoughts humbly and with over 30 years of front line experience in ministry.  I have no ax to grind  by writing this blog, my vision for IL Ministries is to create healthy and growing churches and I  believe that a healthy role for the Lead Pastor contributes greatly to the health of the church.

Here are the main disciplines that Lead Pastors (single staff or multiple staff) should be doing with their time:

1) The Discipline of Prayer - For guidance and wisdom, For fresh vision, For ministry leaders and staff, For ministries, For people in the congregation, For the lost, For insight to scripture, For family... This role of shepherding cannot be done in five minute devotional times or a prayer in the shower.  Pastors  need blocks of time in the work schedule for this type of leadership.  The pastor needs to be provided a place in the church for a nice study or office that is quiet and lends for an atmosphere that is suited for their time with God.  It needs to be obvious in the witness of the pastor that he or she is a praying person.  Let me confess that this has always been the most difficult discipline in my ministry and still is to this day.  Just because it is difficult, it doesn't mean that it can be forgotten or ignored.  I have to schedule it on my calendar just like any other meeting.   I wish congregations would learn to hold the pastor accountable for this discipline more than "remembering birthdays,  visiting your neighbor in the hospital, or writing a thank you letter to the CWC for providing lunch to newcomers".  This is the most important role of the pastor.

2) The Discipline of Equipping the Saints -   I spoke with a lay leader yesterday that asked me, "How can I tell my pastor that he doesn't have to do everything because I want to learn to do ministry? I may not do it as well as him at first but I know I would get better. I want to serve."  Pastor, Equip the saints! I remember many years ago, Joyce looked at me one Sunday while I was setting up communion.  Joyce was always at church early because her daughter was setting up for children's church.  Joyce said, "Why don't you teach me how to do that and I will  take care of it from now on?"  I replied, "that's okay Joyce, I am used to it" and kept on walking.  She followed me into the sanctuary and said, "sit down." 

"Son", she said, "you are a great preacher. I love it when you sing and play the piano.  It is very obvious you love the people in this church. But what you are doing is wrong. You have to stop doing everything around here. I have never seen a preacher do all the work."  Joyce was 30 years my senior and she was right.  Joyce also served on my Elder Board and that next meeting we talked about the discussion and my role changed. My elders changed my Job Description that night and it set me on a new course of leadership.  I hired a coach - I changed my reading and praying habits - I learned the difference between dumping a ministry on the saints to equipping the saints!

3) The Discipline of Leadership and Casting Vision -  Whether the vision is developed by a group of leaders, a congregation or a pastor gets the vision on a mountain top - He has to be the one that drives the vision.  Pastors, learn how to cast vision.

4) The Discipline of Teaching, Preaching and Study - Handle this discipline with expertise and planning.  Plan ahead - God deserves to have time to speak to you in preparation.  The Spirit deserves to develop a message.  A lack of planning and thinking lends itself to sloppy preaching.  The congregation doesn't expect you to preach like Arlo Newell, Dave Sebastian, James Earl Massey or Ray Chin.  However, they deserve to hear from a man or woman of God that has been with Jesus and the message has been developed and inspired by the Holy Spirit.

There are many other things that pastors need to do and do well.  Notice what is not on the list.  If you are pastor, notice what occupies most of your time. Take the time this week to think about how much more effective you could be if you learned to develop these 4 disciplines.

Stupid Thing #1

Stupid Thing # 1

First of all, let me preface these writings by saying, my mother taught me better than to use the word ‘stupid’ but it did get the attention of more readers.  My intention is not to be degrading but catch the attention of a few more readers to recognize what I am trying to accomplish in this writing.

The first stupid thing that churches do that keeps them from effective ministry is, doing too much.  When I was pastoring I would often cringe when I would hear the stories of parents that are running their children from one lesson to another lesson and one sporting event to another. Their side comment was often, “they need a scholarship in something!”  While the effort of parents is admirable to want the best for their children, they would often have to say ‘no’ to some really great events like youth retreats or youth camps/conventions because the kids were so busy.

I remember one evening spending time with a large group of teens after a service at a youth convention.  One teen after the other began to weep about how stressed and tired they were because their parents wanted them in all these activities.  They were afraid to tell their parents because it might crush them and after all the parents had made it clear that their college future depended on the scholarship.

Lisa and I allowed our two daughters to be involved in one thing at a time.  It was mandatory that they stayed active in church activities.  We saved money for their college.  Whether they attended a college was not dependent on if they were a great cheerleader or violin player.  Our youngest attended a specialty college in cosmetology and our oldest graduated debt free from a university.  They didn’t attend a private college and would probably have debt if they had chosen that path.  But they are debt free.

This was our idea of keeping life simple.  We often regret not saving more so they could have had the choice to attend a private college.  We sometimes feel we missed out because they were not a part of more activities with friends.  I love reading about how great my nieces and nephews are doing in sports.  Friends on Facebook are incredibly busy with their gifted and beautiful children.  This blog is not about slamming anyone and saying that Lisa and I did perfect.  It is not in my blood to say, “I am better than anyone.” 

My point is this, in the life of the church, better ministry can be accomplished when churches find their niche and do it to the best of their ability.  Churches do not have to do everything or every new idea.  What do you do best?  Do that – and do it to the best of your ability.  Make sure those three or four things improve each year.  Tell the stories of those things.  Then with everything else, ‘stop it.’  Just pull the plug and concentrate on those things.  Here are a few examples with worship being an obvious given:

·      Worship, Small Groups, Vacation Bible School, Prayer Ministry

·      Worship, Missions, Discipleship, Choir

·      Worship, Sunday School, Food Pantry, Children’s Ministry

·      Worship, Evangelism / Outreach, Senior Ministry, Student Ministry

Once the church begins to show signs of health and growth, you might consider adding another strength to the list of ministries.

Do a few things well or life gets overwhelming, people burn-out, they leave and go to a church that they can find rest.

I Need One More Stupid Thing to Complete the List

10 Stupid Things Churches Do To Keep From Growing

I am thinking about writing a separate blog on each of these stupid things that churches do to keep from growing.  I need one more idea.  Do you disagree with any of them?  Would you change the list?  How about adding one for me?  Once the list is complete, I will talk about each one.


1) Trying to do everything.  Be Simple
2) Establishing the wrong role for the Pastor.
3) Provide a 2nd rate worship experience.
4) Settling for babysitting instead of children's ministry
5) Talent over holiness
6) Refusing to update the facility because it's good enough
7) Trying to be just like another church
8) Lifting discipline higher than reconciliation
9) Letting committees define the vision and direction
10)

Consistency - A Key to Remapping

Okay - back to the subject thought of Remapping -  What type of leadership does it take to remap a congregation?  I have good news.  It has nothing to do with your degree, where you went to school, if you live in the north or south or somewhere in between.  It takes Consistency! Consistency slowly begins to drive the vision further down the road.  In every meeting, in every message, in every lunch gathering... be consistent with the vision that God has given you. 

It is not difficult to follow a map when you know where you are going.  It is not difficult to get to your destination once you have determined it.  Sometimes it's hard to remap a situation when you are so close to it.  So, here's a thought or activity.  I do this all the time with businesses in the community. I think to myself, if I were the owner of this (fill in the blank) car wash, restaurant, dealership, grocery store, whatever... how would I start remapping.  Most of the time it begins with the employees.  Maybe it is a change in a menu or a cook!  Perhaps I would use more water or soap if I managed a certain car wash.  My ideas come because I think about where I would want to take this business.

A few days ago, I revisited a great place in Peoria for ice cream.  I spent so many nights there when I was in high school My girl friend worked there, so that was good.  But it was ice cream, chili dogs, tenderloins, shakes... and my friends.  The place is called Emo's.  I stood in line waiting to order a sugar free cone (that's one thing that changed) and I thought of the gold that has come into this business for over 30 years.  They do a lot of things right.  But if I were the manager, I bet I could think of some things to change. 

Here's an activity: How would you remap a local business in your community?  It is probably safer for your leaders to talk about a failing restaurant than it is your church.  Spend 30 minute on that.... then shift the question to remapping your church.

Guest Blog on Gay Marriage

This writing is from Wayne Cordiero and I thought it was well said.

 

We are all disconcerted about the Supreme Court endorsing gay marriages. But they didn't start this. 

We did. 

The Church began endorsing gay marriages long ago when a large portion of denominations began accepting openly gay people into leadership positions. 

We blame the US government for a such immoral rulings when they simply are following what Christian denominations have already endorsed. 

It might be energy better spent if we would repent and clean up God's house before we get too angry at the White House.

Remember: the Church will always lead spiritually and then we will see the results in the physical. God said we'd be the head ... for good or for bad. 

If we tolerate immorality in our churches, we will see it endorsed in our country. If we tolerate pride and self serving leaders in our churches, we will see the same in our government. 

It's wake-up call... but will we awaken?

What is remapping?

What is remapping?  Strategic change begins by remapping a congregation.  A congregation that is successful to the Great Commission and Great Commandment is constantly remapping.

Let me be clear about something.  Remapping is not changing bylaws.  Remapping is not about if you sing traditional hymns or new songs.  It's not getting a church to raise both hands or getting a church to settle down.  Remapping is not found in a mission or vision statements even if it's laminated.

Remapping is changing the thinking and actions of people in the congregation. It begins by asking questions like:

Why do we REALLY exist?

How could this church REALLY be serving the community that advances the Kingdom?

What would our calendar look like if we were REALLY outreached focused?

What is REALLY the best use of the pastor's time?

What would the agenda of your leadership team look like?

Take a few minutes in your small group, leadership team meeting, Sunday School Class, staff meeting... to discuss these questions

Leading Strategic Change

How do churches change? How can a church change? I think the answers to these type of questions lie in a foundational truth that most people with a fractional understanding of the church grasp. The local church is made up of people. The Church of God is made up of everyone that is a follower of Jesus Christ. The question is never how do we change the Church of God. God forbid! The Church of God is beautiful and ready for the bridegroom to return. The question is always about the local church. How do we get the local church to be more effective? How can we get the local church on target? How does the local church make disciples?

This is the first of several writings on Leading Strategic Change in the local church.

Black and Gergersen in their book Leading Strategic Change states that change in organizations must start internally with the people in the organization. Most other leadership books focus on the external changes that need to be made but these authors propose that change starts within. It starts by remaping individuals within the organization.

The next blog will talk about what it means to remap ourselves and others. Until then, think about what it means to remap.

Staying on Track

Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed. Simon and his companions went to look for him, and when they found him, they exclaimed: “Everyone is looking for you!” Jesus replied, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come.” So he traveled throughout Galilee, preaching in their synagogues and driving out demons.  
(Mark 1:35-39 NIV)

There are certain things that Jesus teaches us about staying on track.  When I first started in ministry I was horrified by the number of pastors that were falling to financial failures or moral failures.  I made some strong commitments years ago to not get derailed due to moral failures.  Here are a few things I learn from the life of Jesus.

1) Lead yourself well.  The best gift you can give to your family and to your congregation is a healthy you.

2) Pace yourself.  You do not have to conquer everything tomorrow.  I tell churches all the time that are trying to change - you eat an elephant one bite at a time, otherwise, it's overwhelming!  Pastors want their churches to grow fast, worship to be better next Sunday, leaders to be trained yesterday.  I learned while pastoring Shorewood, "if I wasn't happy with 50 people in church, I wouldn't be happy with 200."

3) Dating your wife is cheaper than divorce.  Lisa and I have a whole lot of mountains and difficult times over the almost 30 years we've been married.  The things that have kept us in love is keeping the flame burning.  We still date. We still laugh together.  We still pray together.  The best news that I can share each day is that Jesus loves me and my wife still likes me.  Take care of your marriage.

4) Love people more than the crowd. I know individuals that love the crowd.  They love being upfront.  They love the title "Pastor" or whatever... but they are alone.  Develop relationships in the church.  Will you be hurt?  Yes.  It won't always work out the best but it's worth it.  I do not regret developing friends.

5) Define what a 'win' looks like for you?  If you don't define the target, you will never know if you hit it.  What is the target each Sunday morning for you?  What is the target at the end of each season for you?  Define what a win looks like for you.  Celebrate when you win and don't move the target too soon.

6) Avoid isolation.  It's not good for man (or woman) to be alone.  Live your life among others.

Starting Over

Not sure why starting over is so difficult for me.  Even when I know it's the right thing to be doing, it still is just hard to begin.  I know I will never start exercising again, unless I start.  I will never start a new diet, unless I start.  I will never start being a more conscientious worker unless I start. I will never be more loving, unless I start. I will never be more giving, unless I start.  There are so many fresh starts that I want to make. Fresh starts should be exciting.  Every day should hold a fresh start for us.  Defeat cannot keep you down if you start fresh. 

So, here's to a fresh start to blogging!
I'm serious...
I'm gonna do this...